When Caled was only a week old, he would always fidget and fuss when I'm holding him. When I would have my Sister hold him, he would immediately fall asleep, no fuss, no fidgeting.
I would keep thinking on what I was doing wrong. Is it the way that I hold him? Am I hurting him in any way? Is it that he doesn't like how I smell? What??!! And to add insult to injury, I have an Aunt who said that maybe Caled is more comfortable with my Sister and all my Son needs from me would be milk - OUCH! Major ouch! I mean, its really something that no Mommy would like to hear after all, isn't it that the Baby in question lived inside you for 40 freakin' weeks???
I continued with what I usually do with Caled. Feed him, sing him a lullaby, talk to him, read to him and eventually everything changed. He would be so familiar with me that now, he knows if I am in the room or if I'm the one holding him. He would still fuss and fidget when he hears my voice and apparently, this is normal for Babies. It gives you a gauge on how comfortable they are with you.
I read that Babies are more fussy when Mommies are around. This is because Babies know that with their Mommies, they can show their true colors and they will be accepted no matter what. I was surprised and amazed when I read that. I mean - isn't it the same with adults?
I am right now training the Nanny to take care of Caled. Caled is so even-tempered and sweet with her. Whenever she would feed him, I would make it a point that I am not in the room. Caled would normally play with his bottle if I am around. Even if the bottle contains breastmilk, he would still not take it because he knows that Mommy is around and he can get milk from me.
There would always be times when you know you've done everything and the Baby would still keep crying. There would be times when you are on the verge of screaming and crying as well but you have to lengthen your patience more. There would also be times when you would question your decision of having a Baby or even question your sanity. These are all normal, do not be guilty, we are after all only human.
It all boils down to you knowing your Baby. You would know what's best for your Baby and your Baby would help you as well. He would give you signs on what he wants and eventually, you would be able to be so familiar with the signs that you would know what he wants before he can cry his lungs out. Also, you would be able to know what he wants just by the way he cries - believe me....
The most important thing would be to spend time with your Baby. For working Mommies like me, maximize your maternity leave to make sure that you are spending every minute with your little one. I have been told not to carry Caled so much because he will get used to being carried all the time and I would not be able to accomplish anything else. Babies love to be held, I normally hold Caled as much as I can and I still have time to do other things. Of course, initally it's going to be hard, I remember not even having enough time to have a long shower because Caled would always cry but right now, it's different. He knows when to go to sleep and he knows that I would only hold him during daytime and night time would be for sleep. We've developled a routine and Caled got so familiar with it that when naptime comes, it would only take me a few minutes to put him to sleep.
We are still working on the bedtime at night though and it gets a little better day by day. I would not say that it will stay like this since Babies change their sleep patterns too but I will take my cues from Caled and we'll work on it together.
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